Tuesday, September 5, 2017

September 2017 - Seeking For A Turning Point (Again)

Well it has been 7 months  after my transfer from Northern to Central, from a coordinator to a manager. The situation now is...tough. I would say.. its kind of a wrong choice (hehe). Not totally, i mean i can bear with it and learn as much as i can. But the fact is..this is not my cup of coffee. I wouldn't blame the situation i am in. I mean the place, the people, the circumstances..yes it is not perfect. Not perfect at all. Tough. Super tough.

When I decided to move to Central, and take the position I was thinking of a different lifestyle. A better one of course. I get to spend more time with the family, learn new things..earn more on my way up, getting the best out of myself..most important to generally change myself to be a better me in so much ways..Unfortunately..or better I say 

Now work life balance seems impossible for me.. I work 6 days per week. And to add to it the office is not so close to my home. It is 1 hour approximately by car and around 30 minutes by bike. Anyway I bought a new beast (=P).. I will share about that in another post. And with my hard to move habit.. I always end up leaving office at 8.30 PM or even 10.30 PM.. So basically i can change that. I mean i can make my move earlier maybe at 6 PM or 6:30PM.. but its just me..

OK la nak balik dulu..later i will mumble some more...  

Wednesday, February 15, 2017

Im Not Okay

No one know the suffer of me being me.
No one know the conflict I have inside me.
No one know how i feel about myself.
No one know that there's a war inside.
No one know.

Im unfit and no one know.

Monday, February 6, 2017


Banyak benda terjadi on October. Major things that effect me so much.

Aku kahwin Oct 2011
Abah passed away Oct 2015
Ammar diagnosed Oct 2016
Aku having minor operation Oct 2016

Some of the things that happened on Oct change me a bit. Sekarang ni mudah betoi aku touched dengan benda benda sedih. Tengok video sedih baca cerita sedih menitikla ayaq mata aku. Benda yang paling banyak dalam fikiran aku selalunya adalah kesihatan anak aku.